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Bad Parenting Moments: The perfect storm.

Friday, February 8, 2013

The perfect storm.

Schools are cancelled. Children are home. Wine bottles are on display in my kitchen, giving it an air of classy disaster.

I am watching children remove snacks and mixing bowls from cabinets. Hair unbrushed, sliding in pajamaed feet from kitchen to living room to playroom. On the world's most redundant loop of action since the film Speed.

Diaries have already been fought over and a slinky lay forgotten directly in the middle of the sixth stair; abandoned by the children upon its failure to make it, "all the way!".

A tent and tunnel have been set up leaving parental oversight virtually impossible. My view of the chaos restricted by blinding neon blue and yellow polyester. Chocolate pudding sits on the baby's pajamas and face. Abandoned there as a reminder of my failure to successfully hide and administer her morning dose of antibiotics.

I may or may not have washed my hair yesterday. From where is sits today, on top of my head, disheveled and in the hot pink rubber band I found under the bathroom sink in the box of super-plus tampons, it's impossible to tell.

This is what Motherhood looks like at my house on snow days. This is what Motherhood looks like at my house on most days.

And, that's ok with me.

The snow is falling; softly then wildly. At times, a tornado of flakes beats against the windows making its presence known. It has nothing on the storm inside these walls. Surrender. My littlest snowflakes are the only real major force of nature to be reckoned with today.

I have no interest in crafting, baking or Donna Reedifying my day of diminished urgency away. There is no need to load children into a car for school pick-up. No need to shower and put on clothes or go through the pained process of putting on the make-up I seem to use with less frequency when attempting to bamboozle the public into believing I care enough to put on makeup.

I will do nothing. I will sit with my coffee, in the middle of this kitchen cocktail of scrambled eggs and crushed cheerios and let the chaos swirl around me. The perfect storm.

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At February 8, 2013 at 1:51 PM , Blogger Barbara R-G said...

Beautiful. (Just like you!)

At February 8, 2013 at 2:31 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

I agree with Barbara. This is beautiful. Thanks for sharing :)

ā™„ Talia

At February 8, 2013 at 4:20 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

I love your description! I usually have no desire for any projects on snow days either. Those kinds of days are definitely for cuddling and vegging!

At February 8, 2013 at 5:51 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

Just stay safe!! :)

At February 8, 2013 at 8:12 PM , Blogger Meredith said...

Every post I read over here I think, "Damn. She's good."

Please tell me you have plans to write a book. Or have you already and I just don't know about it?

As always, loved this. Enjoy your storm. ;)

At February 8, 2013 at 11:45 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Thank you. I'm quite fond of you as well.

At February 8, 2013 at 11:45 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Thanks for reading, Talia and for stopping by the ol' blog. I appreciate the lovely compliment.

At February 8, 2013 at 11:47 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Agreed. We would be a good vegging team. Although today, in a grand moment of overachieving, I took a shower and replaced my dirty PJs with clean PJs. I know. Next, world domination.

At February 8, 2013 at 11:48 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Thank you for the well wishes! So far, so good. Lights on. Wine in decent supply. Happy kids. Mom in pjs. Life? Good. xo

At February 8, 2013 at 11:50 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Thank you! Oh, to write a book. My great dream. Maybe. Hopefully. Storm is actually quite nice. BIG. BEAUTIFUL. Lights are still on. Heat is still kicking. Riding it out with wine and various desserts. Can't complain. Thank you for reading, mama.

At February 9, 2013 at 7:01 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds exactly like my day! Come bedtime, they didn't even need to change for they were already in their pajamas:) Very nice.

At February 9, 2013 at 7:36 AM , Blogger Janine Huldie said...

Perfect description and am there right now with you having this storm dump a ton of snow on us last night, too. Just happy that we still have power here.

At February 9, 2013 at 7:39 PM , Blogger RobynHTV said...

An excellent plan, my dear. You're making me wish we were snowed in; instead, I'm spot-cleaning dress up clothes that are going to be worn IN PUBLIC in a 2nd grade production of Something You've Never Heard Of on Tuesday. Come on, blizzard...

At February 11, 2013 at 3:39 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

I've always wanted to see a 2nd grade production of Something I've Never Heard Of starring Robyn's kids!

At February 11, 2013 at 3:40 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Hope you maintained power and were able to actually enjoy the snow post hours of shoveling. Xo

At February 11, 2013 at 3:40 PM , Blogger BadParentingMoments said...

Love Jammie days. So efficient. So comfy.

At February 17, 2013 at 8:58 PM , Anonymous Suburban Snapshots said...

This was my today + hangover - 3 children.


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